Suicidal Thoughts: Signs, Myths & Help
- routetorespite
- Sep 23
- 4 min read
Updated: Oct 15
Suicide is whispered in the hallways of my grief and shouted inside the sleepless nights; it is the boulder that sits on my chest. I know you see me smiling—laughing even at times—but that outward sound can sit beside a hollow so wide it feels impossible to name.
My hopelessness began as something etched into my losses — a small, sharp absence carved where joy once lived, where my strength felt enough, where my faith ran deep — and I carried it like a stone until its weight bent me toward an answer I never wanted to consider. It arrived quietly at first: the horizon narrowed, colors dimmed, and a persistent lie took root in my bones — that everyone would be better off without me. Over time that whisper grew teeth and became a voice convincing me that leaving was the only way the ache could stop.
What It Feels Like (Messy, and that’s okay)
Emotions can feel like an overwhelming storm — hopelessness, numbness, shame, fury, or crushing sadness. It’s where thinking becomes tunnel-visioned: the future shrinks, options disappear and pain feels permanent. Then guilt enters the scene for feeling this way, which only deepens isolation.
Sometimes it’s loud and urgent. And sometimes it’s a quiet, persistent ache.
Myth v. Reality
1) Myth: “People who talk about it won’t do it.”
Reality: Many who attempt or die by suicide gave warning signs or spoke about pain. Take talk seriously.
2) Myth: “Only people with mental illness think about suicide.”
Reality: Anyone in extreme pain — emotional, spiritual, financial, relational — can feel suicidal.
3) Myth: “Asking someone about suicide will put the idea in their head.”
Reality: Asking clearly and compassionately reduces isolation and gives permission to talk.
If You are Feeling Suicidal — A Short, Practical Plan
Name it out loud (to yourself or a person): “I’m feeling like I might hurt myself.” Saying it makes the idea less alone.
Use an immediate safety step: remove or secure anything that could be used to harm yourself if possible, or ask someone you trust to help do so.
Reach out now: call/text 988 (U.S.), local emergency services, or a trusted person. If you can’t call, text a friend or use online chat for crisis lines.
Grounding for the moment: 5–4–3–2–1 senses exercise (name 5 things you see, 4 you feel, 3 things you can touch, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste); slow breathing, hold an ice cube, step outside for air. These don’t fix everything but they buy minutes.
Make a short-term plan: Where will you go that’s safe for the next few hours? Who will you be with? What will you do if urges return? Write it down.
Follow up with care: reach out to your therapist, doctor, pastor, or a trusted person to make an appointment or plan long-term support.
How to Help a Friend (Short Guide)
Ask directly: “Are you thinking about killing yourself?” — clear language is best.
Listen without judgment: stay present, avoid trying to fix instantly.
Don’t leave them alone if they’re in immediate danger. Get help.
Help them make a safety plan and connect to professional support.
If you believe they are in imminent danger: call emergency services. If you’re unsure, always err on the side of safety.
When You're Unsure What to Say
If you’re reaching out: “I’m really struggling and I don’t want to be alone. Can we talk?”
If someone tells you they’re thinking about suicide: “Thank you for telling me. I’m glad you told me. I want to help — are you thinking about hurting yourself now?”
If you need to set a safety step: “Would you agree to let me stay with you/call crisis line/go to the ER until you feel safer?”
Small, Honest Next Steps When Hopelessness Creeps In
Tell one person you trust what’s going on.
Create a one-page safety plan: triggers, coping tools, people, professionals, emergency steps.
Remove or secure means of harm from your environment if possible.
Make one appointment: therapist, doctor, or spiritual advisor — keep it.
Choose one tiny grounding ritual (walk, music, breath) and do it daily.
Hope
Hope doesn’t always show up like lightning. Often it’s built in small, persistent actions: someone listening without judgment, a night where sleep returned, a morning with one fewer heavy thought, a call kept, a medication adjusted, a boundary set, or a spiritual practice that steadies the heart. Healing can be slow and messy — but it is possible.
If you’re reading this and thinking about suicide: you don’t have to carry this alone. Reach out now — to 988, or one person you trust. If you’re supporting someone, your presence matters more than you think.
You’re seen. You’re not a burden for asking for help.
Hold on — God is not finished with this story, and your next breath is part of the redemption.
If you’re reading this and the voice in your head is telling you it would be better if you weren’t here: that voice is not the final authority. IT’S A LIE. You are allowed to be tired and still keep going. You are allowed to need help. And you are not a burden for asking for it.
If you or someone you know is struggling with suicidal thoughts, RTR is here to support you. Fill out the form below and reach out to our providers.
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